Latest on twitter:

I keep waking up perpendicular. This is clearly an effort by my subconscious to never wake up on the wrong side of the bed.

being selected to microwave tomato soup is really a lifetime commitment for whichever poor Tupperware the burden falls upon.

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New Yorkers seem real bummed this morning. Something big must’ve happened in the World Series when I switched to “650-lb. Virgin” on TLC.

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protection from the sun: 

at zack and hanna’s wedding over the summer. what do you think? good look?

protection from the sun:

at zack and hanna’s wedding over the summer. what do you think? good look?

Iceland's three McDonald's restaurants closing

“A Big Mac in Reykjavik already retails for 650 krona ($5.29). But the 20 percent increase needed to make a decent profit would have pushed that to 780 krona ($6.36).”

Wow. So much for the dollar menu.

it’s days like this- when i whip out my metro card to open my front door- that i know the men in white coats are on standby for me.

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HALP!: 

I’m on the bus to Boston and I’m either going to explode or get hepatitis!!

HALP!:

I’m on the bus to Boston and I’m either going to explode or get hepatitis!!

Technorati State of the Blogosphere Report: Who Are The Bloggers?

I see no mention of guys who sit in their underwear and don’t leave their couches all day. FAIL, Technorati.

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just got an eye exam. my pupils are dilated and my vision is blurry. i have a sudden urge to operate heavy machinery.

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Held by the Taliban: NYT's David Rohde shares his story

He has published two of five parts of his tale so far, and I have to say, had nytimes.com charged me 5 cents per page to read this (obviously exclusive and obviously captivating) on their website, I absolutely would have paid.

…Not that getting your reporter kidnapped by the Taliban is a viable business plan for saving newspapers.